The heart is a vital organ to the body. It is essential to the body and without it, the body does not function. So, it is imperative that we take care of it physically by eating right and exercising, however, we often do not think about how important it is to take care of our hearts on a spiritual level.
Spiritually, you must be able to guard your heart and know who has the rights to dwell in it. I mean, it sounds loving and romantic when your someone special says, “I want your heart,” but do they really? After all, the heart is delicate and also the powerhouse of your soul. Can you really trust just anyone with it? The answer is simple…no. If you have not realized, opening your heart to someone is scary and it can also be dangerous. After being in a couple of failed relationships, romantically and casual, hopefully you will start to notice, but at times it can be difficult to fully comprehend. Besides, the concept of being in love and having someone cherish and adore you, sounds irresistible and if that is something you long for, you may try to find it in anyone who says and does the right things. However, I have learned, it is best to keep your guard up because you are the only one who can protect your heart.
Now, that is way easier said than done and when you are a hopeless romantic, such as myself, it is almost impossible! You often daydream of the person who is designed just for you because you know they are out there and you never want to give up or possibly miss out. So, you may try to fit someone or anyone in that position because they do the little romantic gestures, such as calling to see how your day has been going, sending cute emojis (the heart eyes and kisses…you know them), having long talks, listening to your dreams and aspirations, and sharing experiences that you would only tell a close friend. At this point, you have begun to expose yourself, which can feel vulnerable and risky. It is nothing more frightening than being exposed and allowing someone to come in to cling to your heart and do as they please. On one hand, they may understand that they have been invited into such a delicate and sacred space and they may embrace it or they may runaway. On the other hand, they may see it as an opportunity to control or they may not comprehend what has been given to them altogether.
I believe there are people who will be devoted and honored to be in such a sacred space, but there are others who know how to manipulate their way in and cause damage just to get what they want or they may not know what it is they want themselves and may say and do things just so they may feel wanted and when they end up too close to someone’s heart, they have no idea how to manage or care for it. This is when it can become dangerous, especially for a hopeless romantic. In essence, you have already allowed someone who does not have any rights to be in the space that gives you life. Now, it is at their discretion to handle it with care, abuse it, or abandon it. The heart, in my opinion, is too delicate to embrace any form of misuse and cannot be left unattended because it will not function properly which will lead to pain, and eventually will stop working in its entirety. This is when the unexplainable feeling of heartache and hurt comes into play. You begin to not enjoy the things you love to do, you avoid tasks or other people, and you are often sad or angry.
At this point, there are only a few paths to take. The path to destruction. You allow anger and hate to take control and think of how to seek revenge on the person who worked their way into your sacred space. Although this may cause brief satisfaction for you, this path almost never comes to a good end. The path to self-blame. It always seems to be your fault because you should have seen “the signs” and you wish you handled things differently or never responded to the text or picked up the phone in the first place. However, these are all learning experiences and if you did see the signs, but chose to ignore them, learn how to forgive yourself and move forward. The path to a hardened heart. You thought you guarded yourself to begin with, but no worries, you make sure to build a “brick wall” to ensure that no one comes into contact with your heart out of fear that someone else will hurt you again and the thought of love is just no longer an option. And the path to it was never meant to be. You settle on being alone or as I like to call it “the cat lady syndrome.” You stay to yourself and keep yourself busy with hobbies and work because you decide that the someone you knew to believe was out there for you is just an imaginative figure and you settle for, it will never happen.
Personally, I have taken trips down all of those paths and sometimes I stay there a little longer than I should. I really do not have the remedy for those thoughts and feelings that develop after sharing your heart with someone who is undeserving because after all, they are human too and have lessons to learn as well, but I do believe that there is only ONE who should have complete ownership of your heart and I know for a fact that you will never feel pain, loneliness, or emptiness because that ONE…is love. In all, you have to be guarded and must stay true to yourself first. So to all of you hopeless romantics out there, it will happen for us, just continue to believe and stay strong with your heart.
~I hope you enjoyed this post, because this will be featured in my book, “The Pieces of My Heart.” Please comment and let me know what you think!